How Do You Really Feel?

How do you feel? Really? I'm not asking you what you think. You can share that, too, if you like. What I'm asking is how do you really feel in this moment? Do you feel tired? Exhausted? Beat down? Depressed? Suicidal? Hopeless? Forlorn?

Do you feel impatient? Anxious? Stressed out? Agitated? Confused? Wound tight? Angry? Defeated? Fearful? Afraid?

Do you feel joy within you? Can you feel the joy flowing out from individuals around you? From your friends? From your family? From society?

How do you really feel? Are you sharing the things you feel with someone close? Or with a complete stranger?

I feel absolutely exhausted. I'm sharing that with you now. I don't feel defeated. To me, life isn't so much a game that you win or lose. But... we continue on and we play anyway. In spite of all the bad news, the trauma we are bombarded with on a daily basis, we continue to stay in the game just because it's what we do. Win or lose. We keep going.

I trust life. It beats me down sometimes. But I get back up again. Often, I find there's a hand reaching out to help me up. Sometimes by a kind glance, a soft word, or someone literally joining in to physically help me accomplish something difficult. Making it a little easier - or a lot easier - by helping. I am grateful. And I share that gratitude with them. With my wife. With my children. With my friends. With my coworkers. This is how I feel. And I share my feelings with them. I am sharing my feelings with you... right now.

I don't regret sharing my feelings with you. I am happy to do so. I experience joy through the connection. And I am always touched when you share your feelings with me.

Thank you.

Time and Chance

Ecclesiastes 9:11 - "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."

Over the years, I have found myself immersed in these words... these thoughts. I have pondered them, prayed upon them and held them in deep meditation and contemplation. Does it matter what I do with my life? Does it matter what any of us does?

Ambition can lead us through many doors. Once again, I sense a need for surrender to the truth that dwells within us. Something that rises above and beyond drive, ambition and determination to accomplish things. For when we surrender to the truth of being honest with yourself by being yourself - by following as well as being led by our own sense of discernment, we realize that our life is unfolding before us just the way it is supposed to be.

Yes. It matters what we do and equally so - how we do. We are passing through time until there is no time. For time and chance - filled with events and consequences - happens to us all.

Surrender and Win

Each day passes. Life goes on. The light comes and it goes. The night comes. The darkness surrounds us. These are the circles, cycles and the vicissitudes of life. We are faced with many challenges. Some are expected. Many are not. In facing these challenges we make choices. Often challenges are ongoing: fighting to overcome an addiction; struggling to survive and simply exist in a variety of toxic environments - at home - at work - even in our sleep. We are challenged to come to terms with religious beliefs - the beliefs of those around us and our own, fledgling ideas based on books we have read, entries in social media and stories our family, friends and enemies tell us. And then we have to weigh it all against our own personal experiences, reasoning, intuition, emotional disposition and our innate ability to think for ourselves.

We fight. We struggle. We regularly - and with great determination - come in through the exit and leave through the entrance. And through all of this we wonder how we end up turned around in a labyrinth of confusion, frustration and unravelling of our own doing. Swimming against the tide. Doing the same things - over and over again - expecting a different result. Or eventually succumbing to apathy. We are so defeated that we miss the message.

Sonia Ricotti has taken an age old message and repeated it in her own way for our benefit. We can take this message, absorb it and allow it to be useful. "Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be." I have done this many times over the years. And it ALWAYS gives me hope.

Sometimes I forget and I fight anyway. Because that seems to be what I have come to believe is my nature: to fight. But I have also seen the way of the peaceful warrior. There is a way to experience the sense of winning without playing the game of war. You surrender to the way. The way of letting go. And embracing hope.

Control is an illusion. But we have the opportunity to be a positive influence. Surrender. Allow the war to be over.